A good morning with the Commission on Ministry

After blogging and praying yesterday morning, I ironed a shirt, put on my most comfortable (and dressiest) suit, and hit the road at 6:00 am. (A suit clearly wasn't necessary, but I wore a suit the first time I visited the Diocesan office, and now I can't stop myself.) I arrived at 8:15 and chatted with a few members of the COM before we had Eucharist around a long table. When the celebrant announced that we would be using Prayer C, the woman next to me groaned and muttered.

After the Eucharist the Commission split into two groups. My understanding was that one group was to talk about the more spiritual side of things and the other about the nuts-and-bolts, practical issues. But in practice there was a fair bit of overlap, and I actually got the same opening question from each. I went to the spiritual group first, and I thought that part went extremely well. They asked good questions, and not in the Inquisition-like way I had expected. It felt much like the meetings of my parish discernment group, more like a conversation than an interview. We talked about my prayer life, what moves me to tears (I got in both tears of joy and tears of sorrow), my sources of spiritual support, how I came to be interested in parish ministry, what my strengths and challenges would be in such a role, and so forth. I felt none of the awkwardness that I often feel in meetings with strangers, and I credit them with establishing a really cooperative and comfortable atmosphere. I was actually funny and even borderline charming.

I felt less comfortable with the nuts-and-bolts group, for some reason, and so I didn't present myself as effectively. I wasn't dreadful, though, and I think I acquitted myself fairly well. They were especially interested in how I understood the challenges of being an openly gay priest in the Church as it is now wrestling with such issues, and they seemed to respond well as I explained that I was a traditionalist at heart and found it challenging to be on the liberal side of any dispute whatsoever. Since I recapitulate in my own life the struggles of the Church at large, I do have an unusual and (I hope) profitable perspective on all that stuff.

At the end of the second session the chair of the COM (who, incidentally, made it clear in the most gracious and oblique way possible that she is on the conservative side on Topic H) said that the Commission would write a report and get it to me as soon as possible. It could still be a while, though, since apparently there are often delays in getting materials through the Bishop's office. So for a while yet I will still be The Aspirant. I'm hopeful, though, that before too long I can upgrade my name to The Postulant.